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Bob Dancer writes a video poker column for beginners to experts. He also writes a column with Jeffrey Compton, "Player's Edge", featuring information on promotions at various Las Vegas casinos. Player's Edge is published each Friday in the Neon section of the Las Vegas Review-Journal. Click here to send Bob Dancer an e-mail.

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Jul 24, 2007

Jury Duty

I've been called to serve on a jury.

I am 60 years old and have never previously done this. I believe I was called for duty about twenty years ago when I lived in Los Angeles, but I begged off because there was a project at work (I was a Data Base Administrator at the time) requiring about 60 hours a week. I just couldn't afford the time off.

This time, however, is different. Although it is not convenient to take a week off, it is not a huge hardship. I postponed it for a month because I couldn't do it while the teaching semester at Silverton was going on, but I will report on September 17 to a courthouse in downtown Las Vegas.

When they ask my profession, I'll be frank. I'm a professional gambler and gambling writer. I suspect this will disqualify me from most juries. "Professional gambler" is a rather seedy profession, after all, at least to many people. Perhaps not so much in Las Vegas. But if either lawyer has an unfavorable judgment starting with "all gamblers are . . . ", then I won't serve on that jury.

It's possible, of course, that I won't be believed when I tell them I'm a successful gambler. A number of otherwise intelligent people believe that the casino ALWAYS wins and that anyone who claims otherwise is some kind of hustler. If one of the lawyers involved is such a person, I'll be excused quickly.

Assuming the lawyers haven't heard of me, they'll have to evaluate me on their preconceived notions of what a successful professional gambler is all about. If they judge such a professional as smarter than average and able to make decisions based on collecting information (which are likely two prerequisites of being a successful gambler), there is still the question of whether they want such a person on the jury. If the defendant is stupid, for example, the defense attorney may well go out of his way to eliminate smart people from the jury. If the defendant is super smart, the prosecutor may decide that they don't want smart people on the jury.

If I'm not required to actually sit on a jury, that won't be a traumatic situation for me. I believe it's an important civic duty for me to show up, and I will, but not being selected is a blessing, not a curse.

Although I won't actually do it, I've toyed with the idea of lying to stay off the jury. It doesn't sound too difficult. In lawyer novels, at least, the judge asks the group of potential jurors lots of questions, such as "Have you or any member of your family ever been . . .?" It seems easy to say, "Yes. It happened to my sister Sophie. It was very traumatic for all of us. We haven't been the same since." How is anyone to know I don't HAVE a sister Sophie?

If that doesn't work, there is always the notion of saying bad things about the defendant from the get go. "That man looks exactly like the S.O.B. who robbed me at gunpoint back in Los Angeles. I'm glad I'm getting a second chance to see that he doesn't escape justice again!" How could I stay on a jury after that?

While I won't actually resort to any such tactics, it's rather enjoyable to speculate on how I COULD beat the system. I personally would be afraid that a judge would see through such a shenanigan and slap me with some sort of "contempt of court" penalty. Spending a few days in jail would not be a good alternative to serving on a jury.

All in all, I expect not to be on an actual jury. I'll show up on time and have a book with me to read. We'll see.